children Archives - Heather Hayes & Associates https://heatherhayes.com/tag/children/ Interventions & Treatment Consulting Wed, 22 Jul 2026 18:08:05 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=7.0.4 https://heatherhayes.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/cropped-HH_logo-32x32.png children Archives - Heather Hayes & Associates https://heatherhayes.com/tag/children/ 32 32 Before They Leave: What Every Student, and Every Parent, Needs to Know Before College https://heatherhayes.com/before-they-leave-what-every-student-and-every-parent-needs-to-know-before-college/ Wed, 22 Jul 2026 18:00:18 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=7761 Every August, millions of parents load up SUVs with comforters, mini refrigerators, laundry baskets, and enough snacks to survive a natural disaster. We make one last trip to Target. We hang pictures on dorm walls. We hug our children goodbye and tell them how excited we are. Then we get back into the car. Some […]

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]]> Parenting Through the Pressure: Supporting Young People in a World Obsessed with Image and Achievement https://heatherhayes.com/parenting-through-the-pressure-supporting-young-people-in-a-world-obsessed-with-image-and-achievement/ Fri, 17 Jul 2026 07:00:00 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=7753 We are raising young people in a world that never turns off. It is a world of curated perfection, constant comparison, performance metrics, public identities, artificial intelligence, viral success stories, academic, social, and athletic pressure, unreasonable beauty standards, achievement and productivity culture, and social media algorithms that quietly reinforce the belief that worth is earned […]

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]]> Transactional Analysis in the DNA of Modern Therapies https://heatherhayes.com/transactional-analysis-in-the-dna-of-modern-therapies/ Wed, 24 Dec 2025 13:21:07 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=7215 How Parent–Adult–Child quietly shaped CBT, parts work, trauma therapy, and inner-child healing. When you zoom out on today’s therapy landscape – CBT, DBT, schema therapy, Internal Family Systems (IFS), ego-state work, EMDR, inner-child work, a pattern appears. Over and over again, clinicians are: That’s exactly what Transactional Analysis (TA) was doing in the 1950s and […]

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]]> When Mental Illness Turns Deadly: The Cost of Untreated Suffering https://heatherhayes.com/when-mental-illness-turns-deadly-the-cost-of-untreated-suffering/ Sat, 20 Dec 2025 08:00:00 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=7231 We need to say this plainly, because avoiding the issue has cost too many lives: Untreated mental illness and addiction kill people every single day, sometimes quietly, sometimes slowly, and sometimes explosively. Deaths come through suicide, overdose, reckless behavior, medical neglect, impaired judgment, and violence toward oneself and others. None of this is inevitable, and […]

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]]> Transactional Analysis: The “Forgotten” Theory That Still Changes How We Relate https://heatherhayes.com/transactional-analysis-the-forgotten-theory-that-still-changes-how-we-relate/ Wed, 17 Dec 2025 15:45:08 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=7208 (and how we can gently re-parent ourselves from the Adult ego state) During parts of the 1960s and 70s, Transactional Analysis (TA) was everywhere: therapy rooms, boardrooms, classrooms, even dinner-party conversations. Eric Berne’s simple but profound ideas about Parent–Adult–Child ego states, games people play, and “I’m OK–You’re OK” language gave people a shared map for […]

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]]> Parental Alienation: A Relational Wound at the Heart of the Family https://heatherhayes.com/parental-alienation-a-relational-wound-at-the-heart-of-the-family/ Wed, 29 Oct 2025 17:00:00 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=7132 Parental alienation is a complex and often misunderstood dynamic in which one parent intentionally or unconsciously manipulates a child to reject the other parent, undermining the child’s attachment and loyalty to that parent. This behavior is most often seen in high-conflict separations or divorces but can occur in any family system where resentment, control, or […]

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]]> Coping with Angry Kids: Advice for Parents https://heatherhayes.com/coping-with-angry-kids-advice-for-parents/ Wed, 30 Apr 2025 17:27:20 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=6837 One of the hardest things to deal with as a parent is children’s anger. I speak to parents who are overwhelmed, confused, and very often hurt or even shocked by the anger their children express towards them, other children, or the world in general. We know from research that anger in children is healthy and […]

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]]> Growing Up At Risk: Part Two https://heatherhayes.com/growing-up-at-risk-part-two/ Sun, 07 Aug 2022 16:00:00 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=4998 Children of Parents with Substance Use Disorder This is part two of a blog series on children of parents with substance use disorder: to read part one, click here. Substance use disorder (SUD) is a widespread problem in the United States. This condition affects individuals from every walk of life, as well as from every […]

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]]> Growing Up At Risk: Part One https://heatherhayes.com/growing-up-at-risk-part-one/ Fri, 29 Jul 2022 16:30:00 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=4992 Children of Parents with Substance Use Disorder Substance use disorder (SUD) is a widespread problem in the United States. This condition affects individuals from every walk of life, as well as from every social or cultural background. Furthermore, as I have written about in the past, the COVID-19 pandemic has been linked to increased substance […]

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]]> My Child is a Perfectionist; How Can I Help? https://heatherhayes.com/my-child-is-a-perfectionist/ Sat, 01 Jan 2022 19:23:25 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=4731 It is an excellent sign when your child strives to be good at something. Maybe they’ve started a new hobby or have a passion for a particular subject.  In most cases, working hard is an excellent trait. However, this quest for excellence can potentially slide into perfectionism, an unhealthy trait that can seriously damage your […]

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]]> Signs of Social Anxiety in Children https://heatherhayes.com/signs-of-social-anxiety-in-children/ Thu, 25 Nov 2021 10:57:00 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=4699 Social anxiety involves feelings of intense panic or fear during social interactions with others. It is one of the most common mental health disorders, with approximately 15 million Americans suffering from it.[1] The fear experienced is disproportionate to the situations and can significantly impact someone’s wellbeing and enjoyment of life.  The average age for social […]

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]]> National Emergency Declared in Children’s Mental Health https://heatherhayes.com/national-emergency-declared-in-childrens-mental-health/ Sun, 24 Oct 2021 04:05:00 +0000 https://heatherhayes.com/?p=4659 “This is a national emergency, and the time for swift and deliberate action is now.” – AACAP President Gabrielle A. Carlson, M.D. This week, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry (AACAP), and the Children’s Hospital Association (CHP) declared a state of national emergency[1] in children’s mental health in […]

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